“As you walk to the boundary of your understanding into the twilight of uncertainty, exercising faith, you will be led to find solutions you would not obtain otherwise.” Elder Richard G. Scott.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

In a good place

So I was talking with a really good friend today about my kids.
I mentioned "They are all just in a really good place in life and I am grateful for that"
After she left, I got to thinking about it and how grateful I am for how far they have come.
They had the past week off school so I got to spend a LOT of time with them and get to know each of them a bit better.
I am grateful for this past week (sickness aside).
I got to bond with my kids and get to know each of them better.
(please ignore the filth, he licked the bowl after I made cupcakes, the LINDT ones!)

I was talking with a really good friend today about being a mom and how grateful I am that my kids are all healthy and happy. I was thinking after about how much I really love being a mom. Being a mom was not something that came easily to me. It's been a hard road with a lot of learning curves. I think sometimes I am too hard on myself, sometimes I am not hard enough. 

I would like to believe that I am a good Mom but there are some days I really doubt it. But then, my kids do something really amazing and I think, "Well, I guess they were taught well or else they would not do that" Like this week. The boys were off school. Oh Thursday, Mr. M had teachers convention. On Thursday morning I forgot to eat until about noon. At about 1 we decided to watch "Despicable Me" (Such a cute movie!) I was on the couch with the kids and then all of a sudden a migraine hit. and hit HARD! All of a sudden I could not think straight and felt ill. This is what happens when I do not eat breakfast. L looks at me and says, "Mom, I can tell you are not feeling well, just lay down and close your eyes. I will watch the kids." The kids being his 7 year old brother who really does not need watching and M, his 3 year old sister who gives anyone a run for their money. But no fear, as he said, I will watch them and let you close your eye. He watched them while I slept. Then when Mr. M got home and made supper, I slept after I puked. When I woke up, I woke up to my supper being on the pillow next to me and L wanted to make sure I had food in case I was hungry. It's times like that that I think, "I am doing something good. I am teaching him to care for others. And he in turn is showing his siblings how to do it too." Makes me proud.

My middle man B teaches me what I need to know about myself. I watch him be determined to be healthy and physically active. I have never craved healthy food. He does! He will kindly remind me before I go grocery shopping what fruits and vegetables he likes. He will happily do any form of physical activity with me and he will encourage me. He has no problem coming to me and having a frank talk with me about my weight. "Mom, you know you are fat. I know you are fat. What do you think we can do about that?" Pretty much, that's how it goes. No jokes. I think it takes a sort of courage to talk to someone you love and be that frank and honest. NOW, don't think that everyone can go around doing that to me. He can do it because of who he is and how he does it. I appreciate that he loves me enough to do it and that he has enough confidence in our relationship to do it.

Little Miss M is the little lady I prayed for. And still pray for. There are some moments when I pray as I cuddle her and Thank my Heavenly Father for blessing me with her in my life and Thank him for her blessing me with so much joy. Then there are moments I pray and ask for strength as I deal with her and her little type A personality. She is really what our family needed though. She brings so much laughing and joy to our home. I really love it! From the moment she gets up until the moment she goes to sleep it's non stop, but she is loving and kind. I thought when she came around that there would be a honeymoon phase with her, that soon her brothers would just push her to the side and want nothing to do with her. It's been over 3 years and they love her more now than the day she was born! She is so kind and considerate of others. She worries about her family or friends who may be hurt or sad. She loves like there is no other. To me, I feel grateful.

Everyday as a mother is a challenge. Somedays I feel challenged beyond what I can handle. That's typically when one of my children will sense it and do something to help me along my way. I cannot count my blessings enough when it's them I am thinking or talking about. I am really grateful we are all in a good place.

1 comment:

JRoberts said...

I hope your kids know how lucky they are to have a mom who loves them so much.