On me and working

I have always had a job since I have been married. 

Actually since I was 14 and started work at the local Dairy Queen.

Technically 11 if you count me working my paper route.

I had a bit of time off for mat leave and moving leave but really, I have worked most of the time since we have been married. 

I have always considered myself fortunate to have a job where I can work around my childrens schedule and bring them to work with me if they are sick.

I have worked as a night auditor at a hotel (SCARY!), for a courier service, as an apartment manager, cleaning doctor's offices and as a contractor.

At the beginning of July, I felt like I should quit my job.

I spoke to the Mr. about it and he said if I could find another job I could quit. 

I was going in for surgery so who was going to hire me?

In September, I felt again like I should quit my job.

I was concerned about finances.

Then L told me he was not going back to school and asked me to homeschool him.

I talked to the Mr. again and got the same response. 

I was so busy trying to teach in the day and do my work in the evening.

I looked for an odd job here and there and just could not find something that fit me and what times I could work (after school)

In October, I felt the feelings stronger. 

I could not only feel like I should quit, I could feel in my heart my kids saying to me 

"Mom, I need you, all of you, not the working you."

I could hear their voices saying to me that they needed me to be home more.

I was nervous to quit my job.

It has been a great job and the income has really helped us with our financial goals.

I talked to the Mr. again and he said the same thing.

Christmas time is a busy time for my job.

THE busiest. 

I was out working one day and called the Mr. to help me finish my job. 

There was no way I could do it all on my own.

He came to help, not at all happy to be there helping.

He was frustrated and in that frustration, I got an answer to prayers. 

He looked at me and said "I want you to quit your job!"

I looked at him and said, "DONE!"

I am so grateful that I KNOW I need to be done work.

When I look at it, my kids DO need me, ALL of me.

They need my attention to be with THEM, ALL of them.

They need me to be available to help out with school work, shuttle them here and there, be a mom to them and sit and talk all night, not to be pre-occupied with work. 

The night I went in and gave my boss notice I was tucking my favorite 1 year old in.

He rolls over and snuggles into me and says, "Mom, thank-you for quitting you job for me."

I know this means changes in my life, and almost all for the better! 

The thing I am most nervous about is our budget BUT I know I am doing what the Lord wants me to do. 

I know we will be okay.

I am grateful for Mr. M and his hard work in a difficult job.

I GET TO BE A 100% STAY AT HOME MOM!!!!
Three cheers!

Happiness

Happiness is having your very favorite 12 year old come home after being away with your parents for 11 days and getting the BEST hug from him. 

It was the sweetest "I love you mom" hug ever.

I have actually gotten about 10 today.

I am so grateful he got to go to SLC, Moscow, ID, see the Christmas devotional, listen to laugh radio and read the book "Chester I love you"

I am so grateful he had safe travels.

I am so grateful he got to spend so much time with parents.

I am grateful he is home.

I love him.

Grateful

Today, I am grateful for Miracles.

Answers to prayers and MIRACLES.

Love to my friend who received a miracle.

To the lady...

(This may come out as mean but I am not trying to be mean, just document how I feel)

To the lady who told me that by homeschooling my son, he would turn out weird.

Honestly, your opinion is not one I care about.

( I don't really know you so why would I care?)

I don't know why you would feel like I would care about your opinion if you gave it.

Would you listen to me if I said things about your kids?

Especially if it was negative?

Probably not and I would understand.

It is a comment though that has rolled around in my head every now and again.

I don't really let it bug me. 

I did until I realized I didn't put value on this person's opinion.

But there are moments that it comes to mind and I think

"If this is weird then I will take weird any day!"

Moments like this.

This morning I was in my room while my son was working on math. 

He comes into my room, gives me a hug, looks at me and says "Mom, I love you."

For a young man who is not an overly affectionate kid at all, this is a moment that makes my heart soar!

There are times he comes to me perplexed with a problem and says 

"Mom, I need your help with something. I am just not able to understand this question."

For a young man who has a very hard time asking for help, let alone say he does not understand something, this is huge.

And apparently weird.

I will take weird any day!

There are times when we sit down to read our scriptures together. 

Sometimes he directs the conversation, sometimes I do.

I would not have thought of my son learning to direct Gospel discussions was weird but I will take it.

There was one day I could tell he was just going to struggle thru Math.

That day could have turned into a terrible day for him.

I had the prompting to change Math to making cookies for his Young Men's President.

L really respects and loves his YM's president.

The whole day changed around when he found out he would be making multiple recipes of cookies (doing Math fractions!) 

But his whole attitude was SO much better.

If it is weird that he can learn to serve those who serve him and have a good time doing it, then weird it is!

I have watched my little man learn to love and care for his parents and siblings in a way he never has before.

I have watched him learn to be able to say kindly that he does not agree with me and cause a big fight over something so little.

I have seen a young man become confident in himself, who he is and what he stands for.

I have seen a young man grow closer to the Lord.

I have seen him realize his OWN worth.

I have seen this young man become a peacemaker!

I don't know how that could be considered weird at all.

In fact, these are all traits that I have wanted for him but for the past 12 years, really struggled to know how to help him.

In the 2.5 months we have been homeschooling, I have seen such growth in this young man.

I am proud that he asked me to homeschool him!

I am grateful he has trusted me enough to ask him to do this for him.

I am grateful to be at home so I CAN!

I am grateful to be able to learn alongside him.

I am BEYOND grateful for a great school board who helps me so much.

I am MORE THAN GRATEFUL for those who have walked this path of homeschooling before me and have guided me.

I am grateful that there is a Math Curriculum out there that I don't have to come up with on my own!

I am grateful for those that have helped me to create other curriculum.

I am grateful for learning opportunities with my son that make me realize how blessed I truly am.

L-man, I love you more than you could know.